Tom Jones Turns Them On

by Bernie Decker, The Knickerbocker News, June 21, 1971

They stood in the broiling afternoon sun outside the stage door of the Saratoga Performing Arts Center, yesterday, 150 or more of them. All ages, from grandmas to teeny-boppers; all classes, from gum-snappers to martini-swiggers; all manners of dress, from hot pants to haute couture.

They were waiting for Tom Jones.

OBLIVIOUS to the fine big band sound of Jeff Sturges’ Universe, to the singing of a talented trio, the Blossoms, to the sophisticated humor of comedian Pat Henry, they waited … and waited … and waited.

A chauffeur-driven Cadillac faked them out once. They yelled in anticipation, only to see the chauffeur step out with a silver foil-covered plate in his hand. The back seat was empty.

When Jones’ maroon Cadillac did arrive, it was with a skirl of tires and a hasty exit that had the timing of a big-time jewel heist.

The women were left squealing over an eight-second glimpse of their idol.

If what many of them did beforehand was foolish, their actions during the performance were ludicrous. A fiftyish, 200-Ib. woman leaps to her feet at the conclusion of one of his songs, squealing and waving her hands.

At the conclusion of each song, any number of women proffer handkerchiefs and tissue for Jones to mop his perspiring brow, then tucking them away with all the care of a pilgrim handling a relic.

One woman leaps on stage and achieves the Holy Grail: A kiss from Tom Jones.

When one six-year-old in a front row turns down an offer of a kiss, three women rush from the rear with their darlings offering them as—surrogates—a disgusting spectacle.

A pair of panty-hose comes flying on stage. One woman rushes down front and is carried back to the rear by an usher.

Obviously, a Tom Jones performance deserves a sociological study rather than a review. Animal magnetism and sex appeal seem too simple an explanation for the power to turn women into giggling or disgraceful fools.

TO A MALE—me—he seems to be a cross between early Elvis Presley and ersatz soul. It’s enough, however, to earn him $25,000 a performance. Singing about 13 or so songs, he earns almost $2,000 a song.

Maybe I’m jealous.

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